Karmic ties from past lives bring us friends. For us Amitabha-reciters, a distinct Buddhist group, our friends come in four shades.

First Type: Fellow Amitabha-reciters

       Amitabha-recitation unites fellow practitioners globally like siblings. These fellow reciters are our most precious friends. Though not blood related now, we’ll be reborn as Amitabha enlightened lotus children. Even if abandoned by others, Amitabha and our fellow reciters remain steadfast by our side. Master Shandao repeatedly urges us to stay close to one another.

       As ordinary beings, our faith might waver, but fellow reciters provide staunch support. We share the same teachings, aspirations, and look up to the same Buddha. We’re like-minded Dharma friends, journeying together to the most precious destination - the Pure Land - caring for and supporting each other along the way.

       This support is crucial in our chaotic, Dharma-ending age. Daily challenges and dissenting views test our resolve. Group recitations, even online, fortify our faith. Like a bundle of chopsticks, we’re stronger together. Alone, we might falter; united, we stand firm against skeptics.

       As the proverb goes, "Pliant grass amid erect hemp straightens itself." Immersed in an environment dedicated to the practice of reciting the name of Amitabha, we naturally align with the Buddha’s compassion. This subtle influence by the environment works its magic gradually over time.

       The ancients likened this to walking in mist - our clothes do not get visibly wet, yet we feel the moistness all the time - a subtle, yet constant influence.

       True friends are blessings to cherish. They are companions and teachers, just as Amitabha vowed to be an “uninvited friend” to all sentient beings. A truly virtuous friend kindles our faith where there is none, strengthens our existing faith, spurs us on when we’re slothful, dispels our doubts with wisdom, lends us an ear and offers comfort in times of trouble, stands by us amid calamities, and even offers assistance in Amitabha-recitation in our final moments. How can we not cherish them?

       Master Shandao stresses:

Fellow Dharma friends on the Pure Land path
Should stay close to each other and never part.
Countless kin, though dear,
Aren’t the transformative condition for enlightenment.

       The Master values these friendships above family ties, which often entangle us in negative emotions. These intense feelings can dominate our every thought, potentially leading us to the three wretched realms. In contrast, fellow practitioners foster conditions that lead to liberation and rebirth in the Land of Ultimate Bliss.

The Second Type: Buddhist Friends Practicing Non-Pure Land Paths

       We encounter many such friends. Some may have drifted from Pure Land practice and become this type of friend, while others in this group might later join the Pure Land path. These friends, lacking shared doctrine, feel less close. Yet, compared to non-Buddhists, we feel a kinship and rejoice in their practice. When interacting with them, we should heed Confucius: 'A cultivated person maintains accord without compromising his own ideas.’

       While respecting their practices and rejoicing for them, we should stay vigilant. Those unfamiliar with Pure Land teachings might, due to attachment to their own path, hinder our cultivation. They might try to persuade us to follow their path. Faced with different understandings of the Dharma, reflect on Master Shandao’s teaching:

       “Why confuse me with practices that don't resonate with me? What resonates with me may not be what you seek, and vice versa. If we each follow our path with joy, we'll achieve liberation swiftly. At the intellectual level, one can explore all teachings - from those guiding ordinary beings to become sages (such as Arhats, Sravakas, Pratyekabuddhas, and Bodhisattvas), all the way up to attainment of Buddhahood. However, if one wishes to practice the teaching, one must rely on the Dharma one has affinity with. This approach yields significant benefits with minimal effort.”

       Master Shandao says these friends are like the eastern bank bandits in the parable of the Two Rivers and the White Path. They call out to the traveler who has just taken a couple of steps on the white path, determined to follow it without doubt or apprehension: “Come back! This path is treacherous. You’ll surely die. We mean no harm.”

       These friends, though well-intentioned, might cause a retreat from the white path. In such moments, remember Master Shandao’s words:

       “The traveler, hearing their calls, neither looks back nor wavers. Single-mindedly, he presses forward, his thoughts fixed on the path. In but a moment, he reaches the western shore, forever leaving behind all perils. There, he is greeted by virtuous friends and feels boundless joy.”

The Third Type: Worldly Good Companions

       These are friends who haven’t encountered Dharma teachings. They’re pitiful in Buddha’s eyes - ignorant of karma and the six realms of samsara. When possible, we should guide them to have faith in Amitabha and practice reciting the Buddha’s name. This is the essence of true friendship. If they lack the karmic affinity to the Dharma, follow Master Huijing’s advice in the Attributes of the Pure Land School governing everyday life  - offer peace, joy, hope, and spiritual benefits. Treat them with kindness, sincerity, gratitude and respect.

       Maintain an even-keeled relationship that doesn’t get too emotionally charged, as steady ships sail farthest. Intense passions often don’t last. By keeping things simple and quiet, we avoid getting caught up in trivial worldly matters and wasting our precious time. Master Ouyi once said, “As you dial down your wordly bonds, your Dharma practice gains equal ground.” Save the energy and time for Amitabha-recitation!

The Fourth Type: Worldly Harmful Associates

       These troublesome individuals are best avoided. Shameless and detrimental to our spiritual cultivation, they’re like sticky tar - the more you try to clean it off, the more it spreads and the messier you become. Their presence in your life may be due to some past karmic debts, and if you’re unfortunate enough to get involved with them, it’s wise to cut ties decisively. While practitioners of some Sacred paths might view this as an opportunity to practice virtues, we must recognize our limitations and lack of power as ordinary beings. It’s prudent to focus on Amitabha-recitation, ensuring our liberation from samsara.

       Many well-meaning Buddhists often advocate compassion towards these individuals. While not inherently wrong, this approach requires caution. We lack the wisdom and patience of Buddhas and Bodhisattvas to transform these toxic people effectively. We also do not have the energy for their games. Trying to do something which is beyond the ability of ordinary beings isn’t just futile, it can backfire and hurt us. Maintaining a polite distance is advisable.

       After rebirth in the Pure Land and attaining enlightenment, we’ll be as indestructible as the vajra (diamond) and impervious to harm, having transcended life and death. We can then return to help these individuals. At that stage, every interaction, whether positive or negative, becomes an opportunity for liberating sentient beings.

       The above are just my personal opinions. To sum up:

       With fellow Amitabha-reciters, be close and supportive. With practitioners from other traditions, be respectful and friendly, but stay vigilant and be true to our faith. With worldly good companions, be loving and kind, gently guide them when the opportunity arises, but keep the relationship on an even keel. With worldly harmful associates, keep a polite distance to avoid endless entanglements.

       The Buddha said, “Contentment is our greatest wealth, and good friends are our closest kin.” There’s also an old saying that goes: “Parents give us life, but friends help us grow.” Like-minded friends who share our values are sometimes more helpful in our lifelong development than family. They even play a more important role than our teachers. This holds true both in worldly matters and on the spiritual path. For us Amitabha-reciters, it’s crucial to understand what constitutes a truly valuable friendship and to be discerning in choosing our friends.

Translated by the Pure Land School Translation Team;
edited by Householder Fojin