There are times when our conscience tells us that we are mean and owe our family and friends a lot.

But why are we mean to others? In fact, it’s because we are maltreating ourselves. As a result there is a hollow of discontent inside us that needs to be filled. We simply drag others, in random fashion, into this endless pit of suffering, starting with those closest to us. That’s like a heavily indebted person who borrows first from relatives and friends.

If we treat ourselves well and are happy and secure, we certainly will not treat others badly. On the contrary, we will bring joy to those who cross our path. Consider a well-off person. He does not need to borrow money, and can even help the needy.

To avoid causing misery to others, we should start by not causing misery to ourselves. But we seem to forget this, thinking we are good, fine persons.

We must depend on our conscience to tell us whether we owe others. Whether we owe, or have been unduly harsh on ourselves, we have to rely on our Buddha-mind. In its absence, we would be ignorant of this obvious fact.

Can family and friends fill the emptiness and loss in our heart? It is a bottomless pit. All who come near it will fall to their death. Only Amitabha Buddha can help. He says to us, “Let me fill the hollow in your heart.”

We can then feel secure, fulfilled. Only when we are filled with Amitabha’s great compassion and love do we feel truly at peace, lacking nothing. And only then can we make up all that we owe others.